Powerful… Charlie

When he grabs you, taking hold of you, your belly tightening as he kisses your neck. You’re destroyed, you’re no more yourself. It’s an ebb of feelings surrendering in you, setting your core on fire. Twisting softly under him like a butterfly aching to be set free. You’re encapsulated by him, fluid, liquid, pleasure flowing with every kiss. Strong hands on your belly, on your essence. It aches bleeding out moan after moan. Sweet passionate prison. Crimson building up in you, through you. The build up to another world, Heaven. His center on yours, his heart over yours, collision of love, of achy bliss. Lips looped in –


“Oh God Charlie! You startled me! What are you doing? How did you get here?”

“I don’t know. What are those two doing? That is not… Are they having sex?”

“Charlie… what do you want? I’m in the middle of writing a scene here. Be quick. I have to get back to this.”

“Man Mel! You’re fucked up. A butterfly aching to be set free? Where do you get this stuff!”

“Don’t laugh. This is what I do. This is what you do by the way.”

“No way. That’s not me.”

“If you say so.”



“I miss her.”

“Awe… Charlie… I told you. Your life’s about to change darling.”

“I can’t stop thinking about her and I want her back. I need her.”

“Look. Go back to work and settle that deal. It’s all smooth sailing from there. I promise.”

“What is with you and that deal?”

“Charlie, need I remind you, that you’re a work of fiction. You don’t really have a choice.”

“Right… that’s why I’m here. You called me.”

“No… but. I don’t know why this is happening.  Okay! I don’t know how you’re doing what you’re doing, but you should go back home. Go back to work and move on. I’m going to fix everything.”

“How? I’m all messed up. I regret ever looking at Rachel. I should have walked away, out of that boardroom.”

“True.  But something made you stay and the rest is history. Angela wasn’t exactly innocent, you know.”

“Yeah but… I neglected her. I’d been so busy…”

“Why didn’t you tell her about Rachel? When she told you about her affair, why did you freeze?”

“You tell me. You make me do things I don’t want to do.”

“Charlie. What do you want from me?”

“I want everything the way it used to be. I want Angela back and I want the affairs to be erased.”



“Charlie, she didn’t love you. She had something missing in her after you married, she… She’s not your match!”

“You’re a fucking bitch!”

“Charlie!” (That hurt.)

“You’re horrible for doing this! You think you can just play with us like this? You think…”

“Charlie. Stop.”

(How is he doing this? I haven’t clue what to do with him? I must be losing my mind.)

“You are. Did you forget I can hear you? I just want a normal life Mel. I want to do my barbecues in the back yard and I want to invite neighbors over for brunch and hear stories from the old plumber next door.”

“You want to see her again?”

“Yes. Please. I’m hurting for her. I need her.”

“And then?”

“And then I want to talk to her. I want to sort things out.”

“And if it doesn’t work?”

“Please. Look at me. I’m a mess!”

“Oh my God! Charlie what did you do!”

“Shit! Shit! Shit!  Is she going to eat me? Oh God! I don’t want to die by Vampire Mel!”

“Everyone just settle down… Stop!”

“Oh God! Whew! I thought that was going to be it for me!”

“Charlie… tell me what you did to get here!  Tell me why when I yelled stop they disappeared and you didn’t.”

“Mel, you’re the writer. I just knew that I wanted to see you, talk to you.”

(I’m going crazy for sure.)

“I can still hear you. I mean… don’t you get it? You can just say anything to them in front of me.”


“You’re audience.”

“Charlie do you remember waking up this morning?”

“Yes. I woke up and made myself breakfast. I cried. Then I laid in front of the TV watching documentaries until it got dark again. They’ve been calling from the office. I haven’t answered any calls. I don’t care if I get fired! Wait, what’s wrong? What’s that look about?”

“Nothing. Can you think yourself back to the house?”

“I don’t know.”


“Hey! That was pretty nifty. Cool.”



“You’re extraordinary. Better than fiction. You don’t have a clue, do you?”

“I’m talking to you and I shouldn’t, technically, be talking to you?”

“What’s happening?”

“What’s happening is that you’re nuts! You letting me see her again or not?”

“Yes. Just stay put. I’ll figure something out. But… you promise to go back to work?”

“Yes. Thanks. Thank you so much.”

“And you have to tell her the truth.”

“Right. I will. I love her. I’ll do anything to get her back.”

“Damn it Charlie! If I didn’t love you so much…”

“Mel, she means more to me than anything.”

“Good night Charlie.”

“Mel… is this okay?”


“What’s happening between us?”

“I don’t know.  Something’s not right.  Ever since I let you out the first time… something’s off.  I’m too tired to wrap my head around it right now.”

“Your mind’s a blank now?  You can’t go back to that love scene because of this, can you?”

“I don’t think so.  Not tonight anyway.”

“Sorry.  Song’s still looping though. Wanna dance?”

“Not tonight. I should get to bed. Good night Charlie.”

“Good night Mel.”

© 2017 Mel Gutiér


Charlie In My Head

Dancing With Charlie

44 thoughts on “Powerful… Charlie

  1. Pingback: 100 DoRaM: Day 53 – The Charlie – Fiction in My Head

  2. I am utterly impressed with all of this! It’s a brilliant concept and the characters and descriptions are so well-thought out (giving me insight into your mind, of course). I decided to write one comment that served for all three so far – hope that’s okay.
    To me, Charlie is the embodiment of the battle of romance, the battle between what we want and what happens to us, our desires and what we ‘settle’ for, and how we often pursue something subpar obsessively rather than allow ourselves to relax and wait for the right moment, the true feeling, the real thing. That love that comes easily and slowly, confidently, like building a house over time, with foundation and so forth – rather than renting a hotel room for a night and quickly skipping over all the delicious dialog and savoring every interplay and moment, just to rush headlong into passion, the castle in the sky that has to crash someday.

    I love it. Don’t stop. 🙂 Also, in this and any other conceivable contest or comparison between your writing and mine, I concede, graciously. You are so damn good! I’m so glad I’m following you. So glad we’re friends. I mean that.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Me? Have you read the comments on day 1 of the 100. I’m a work in progress.;-)

        Stop it you’re very talented! You’re insulting me now. I wouldn’t follow you otherwise. Read my why I follow post. It’s sincere.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Dancing with Charlie – Fiction in My Head

  4. Pingback: Charlie in My Head – Fiction in My Head

  5. Well now. Another North Texas guy who writes dialogue. Whose characters come sit on his shoulder and tell him what to write. Excellent. I gave up, or gave in, and listen to them. I forced a character into getting dirty when it could have been a “Captain Blood”, guy fights the pirates for girl of his dreams and off to a happy ending. She’s still bitching and demanding edits and rewrites and may make me throw 100k words away and settle for the sophomoric, cue the sunset kiss on Venice Beach. Unless we can reach an agreement. She thinks I want everyone to think she’s stupid. I want them to see her as angry and unable to commit until she opens up. Jesus, you know. There are those “Bitch, will you just shut UP” days…But then they go off in a huff, or give you stink eye from the corner and there goes two or three days writing blog posts because nobody’s home in the imaginary world. One of those character results is over at Jac’s. Elise says to me “I am a better shot than Caswell, We were peers. I am NOT going to be inside information and office decoration.” So…And when they want to break the rules you’ve established for behavior in a novel? Like your bit above. You won’t win that argument, I promise you.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Neighbors indeed! We should start a writers group. In a public place. I go out of my way not to an internet weirdo, really. There’s a guy, not as old as me, but old, down in Oak Cliff who can write. Might be the beginning of beta readers you can trust. You can hit me with email from the contact page, check me out on LinkedIn or SoundCloud, run a background check. I think when I comment it drops my email in the stats page as well. Say Hey!

        Liked by 1 person

  6. This is just the kid in me, but if there’s gonna be an interaction between two psyches, could there maybe be some kind of psychic manifestation of objects or concepts? Like materializing memories or symbols or something? Just my inner geek coming out, LOL!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. superwifeandmummy

    Before I go on- you can delete my previous comment so we don’t expose your(my) fab idea too much!!! ❤
    Oh, I’d be over the moon for you if that happens. I see a bright, bright,brilliant future for you honey.

    Of course we think alike. I knew it from our first conversation.

    Email may be a good idea considering the length of our chit chats!! 😂

    But yeah, I read some of her blog. You’re right, mostly inspirational stuff but something…. Actually, I can’t remember where she came from. It was one of those she followed me so I followed back, I always do unless it’s a scam or hyper religious indoctrination. Then yesterday she left a few( *a lot) of comments on some posts; mostly funny or short and sweet and I thought- ok! Fun follower here! Then that comment. .took me aback. Weird and i didn’t understand! Then I read some of her comments again and thought, maybe she’s just jealous? Anyway. I spammed a lot of the comments. Then she linked to my Immovable Traveller post and said she enjoyed it and it made her think about things. Then she went on about …I don’t know something about how she writes sensual poetry or something and I switched off after a while, said thanks for linking to my post and that’s that. Who knows what her issues are. Blocked her out of my precious brain now.😌
    I love that you are here on WP and in my little virtual life. Our interaction makes my online day happier, cheekier and cheerier! It’s almost as though we’ve been friends for ages…weird. we don’t even know what each other looks like! I could be a hideous troll and you could be a huge, geeky guy in his mum’s basement pretending to be a lovely Latina called Mel. Who knows! !
    All I know is if have genuine affection for you and appreciate everything you say and share with me.

    I have to finish lunch now and sort myself out.
    Lots of love X

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I assure you, even though I do live with me Mum, I’m no geeky guy in the basement. I’m a crazy, British loving, Latina who, have noticed any Mexican characters yet? Lol… Who loves to write and now loves to blog about it!

      Always here if you need me!

      You’re friend


  8. A great piece of dialogue, which moved along nicely, and I actually new what was going on, between the two of you, until poor Charlie thought he was going to get eaten, haha, there’s a crazy mean streak in you Mel….hmmm, you don’t carry a big knife and poison ivy in your bag too !!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s