100 DoRaM: Day 6 – Day 6?

I’m barely at Day 6? That’s like 94 more days. Right? (Gulp)

I clearly did not think things through. That’s a lot of days! Giggling to fits of laughter right now from sheer panic.

Only one song comes to mind and we’ll go from there. John Newman’s Losing Sleep. Hmm… not sure where that came from.  Sometimes I have nights like that, all the time. I get all worked up and lose it completely. I can’t sleep. Thoughts, characters, life… It’s crazy. I’m sure I’m not alone in this. I’m sure some of you feel that way sometimes. John Newman… feels funny how I’m enjoying this song even… it’s sad, isn’t it?  I really like this song.  It’s passionate, pleading, begging.  Intense.  I feel it. Good stuff.

I’m going to roam in my head a little.  Okay? You know… go off track.

I know a lot of you follow and don’t comment. I’m okay with it. I just wish sometimes I knew why? But I’m good. I’ve visited a lot of your worlds. I get it. There is some connection. Some of you though… What led you here? I’m always baffled when I get a new follower.  Mainly because I never really had an audience.  I know I have some dear friends. I know I have at least two really good friends… you know who you are. Connections are easy here. Well not easy, but intense. It’s so much better because we get to know each other fast. You’re not anyone but yourself and they accept you. You accept me. Ever felt that? I’m completely open here. I’m me. What you read is what you get. If I comment it’s sincere. If I don’t it’s because I might not have the time. If I haven’t seen you in a while, it’s because of time issues.

Time… Some Kind of Heaven? What’s happening there? You ask. Or maybe I’m just rambling. Right? It’s actually going well. I’m starting to feel I have something really solid. I can’t believe how well I’m able to split my chapters. I hope my readers appreciate it. I remember the first time I gave chapter 1 to a friend to read. I asked her to be completely honest. “It’s good. Just… maybe you can break it up for the reader.” I was like What? LOL Now there is a prologue and a shorter Chapter 1. LOL. Instead of seven chapters in part 1, there will be around 12. I hope the finished product pleases you all. I have big plans but I shall not reveal serious details until it’s ready. Where do I find the time? Now, working in the late hours of the night. I’m losing slee–



“Yes. It’s me”

“Umm… what are you doing? Where are you? I can’t see you.”

“I know. I don’t want you see me. I’m naked.”

“Charlie. What? How are you doing this?”

“I told you before. I have no idea how this is happening. I just know I couldn’t sleep tonight. I got hot and just took everything off. Hey…”


“What are those strangers doing all bunched up like that?”

“What strangers?”

“The people… oh… that’s just your brain matter. Gross. You’re all blocked up and shit.”

“Oh God! What do you want now? Why haven’t you gone back to work?”

“I’m going. I just… I kept thinking about Angela and I couldn’t sleep tonight.”

“Oh God! Put something on! Geeze! Actually, let’s talk. But put some pants on. You may be good-looking and all but I don’t want to see your business all up in my face!”

“Mel… I feel weird like I’m dead or something. Bizarro Superman world shit. For example, yesterday.  I spoke to Gary at the office. They want me back right away. That client, that Phillips guy, he wants me as the front man on the project. I thought… I thought they wanted to restructure the whole thing but something happened. It feels weird to me. It feels weird because she’s not a part of it and because…”

“Please Charlie. I don’t want you to be sad. Just do what you have to do. Things are happening. The wheels are turning. Go back. You’ll see.”

“I miss her body. I miss her. I want so much to kiss her. I want to see her smile and feel her touch again. It’s that bad. Why did I ever let you get to me like this. You get to be who you want and live the way you want. I don’t. And somehow seeing you comforts me. I guess it’s because I can’t see her. You’re all I’ve got.”

(Hugging him like this makes my heart break. I don’t know what it is about this man, but he is something.)

“Okay. How many times do I have to tell you? I can hear you.”

“I know. I just can’t help thinking. Listen…”

“You have beautiful eyes. You want to come back to the house?”


“You and me… It’s not like you’re cheating?”

“Okay. This is insane! Get a hold of yourself Mel. This is not happening!”

“Oh! It’s happening! So… are you in or…”

“Charlie. You take your hands off me right now and grow up! Grab your balls and march right back to your life. You’re not a child. You’re not even real!”

“See… that’s your problem.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re faking. You’re like… Oh… I talk to my fiction… they talk to me… Blah, blah, blah. Here I am missy, talking to you! You? You’re stuck in a fantasy while here I am as real as those lips of yours. Mel…”

“Get off! Stop it!”

“Bring her back! I want her back! And maybe you’re the one that needs to do some growing up! Ever think about that?”

(I’m scared now. I want to help him but, he’s not real.)

“You know for a bright ass woman… you’re something silly mixed in with crap all over.”

“Charlie! Please! I’m doing what I can.”

“Save your sappy crap for some of your other fakers! I’m real!  You… Do! Better!”


“Where are you going?”

“Following orders, boss lady. I’m going back to my glorious life! You keep swallowing shit until you choke on it and get back to me when you’re ready to get serious!”


“You’re over your word count.”


© 2017 Mel Gutiér

17 thoughts on “100 DoRaM: Day 6 – Day 6?

  1. Pingback: 100 DoRaM: Day 53 – The Charlie – Fiction in My Head

  2. Charlie is taking over! But maybe I’m wrong about what he represents. I don’t know. It’s brilliant and entertaining but I always like to look behind the curtain. I’m following you because there’s someone back there with brains, heart AND courage…

    …and magic. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  3. WHY am I following you Mel ? As I’m talking to myself, Well, I like the way Charlie is standing up for himself, and I’m waiting for that moment when you go to bed together(although doesn’t that happen every night), and I’m waiting for Angela to return, and I’m waiting for Charlie to go back to work and telling them all to get f—ed, and I’m waiting for white ambulance to take “Us” all away !!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. superwifeandmummy

    Bahahaha haha! Oh my god Mel. The last 3 lines. Some kind of genius, love .
    I love this. Charlie really told you what’s what didn’t he? I thought he was a bit of an a**hole at first reading a month or so ago but I’m liking and understanding him a lot more.
    A lot.
    You’re doing brilliantly at this. I am loving all of these posts. You have not sacrificed any of yourself by doing this, trust me. You’ve just super condensed yourself and if anything, that’s more alluring.
    Don’t worry about why people follow. I was curious as well. Still am a bit. In fact I get a new follower sometimes and I actually ask aloud, why?why are YOU following me?!
    Who knows hon. I know why some people do it; they relate or liked a post or were enticed by a comment I left elsewhere but don’t let it get you overthinking. Enjoy the audience.
    What else. …Oh I do love the multimedia. It’s unique and matches the effervescence of your brain. Bit of this, dash of that, sprinkling of this…just like you.
    Love ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I’m new here! I’m enjoying the words and the frequent posting! I know what you mean about splitting chapters! I had to do the same thing! At first it felt wrong and like I was making a mistake and it shouldn’t matter how long the chapters are! Now I look back and wonder what the heck I was thinking! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi. I’ve seen you around and I’m happy to have you. I’m so glad you’re enjoying this. It’s new to me. I was inspired by some very strong and talented people but I have to put my own spin on it.

      This is totally new to me. It’s forcing me to focus, stive for a goal and finish.

      Thank you so much for reading and commenting and … following. Will make it over your way some more soon.

      Have a lovely day! 😉


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s