Sex Mints

Hello lovelies!  A while back I had a very delightful conversation with one CLEVER man.  Some things were said that were quite outside of the box type stuff.  Anyway, I challenged the man to use a few choice words in a story.  Honestly the man is brilliant and he had this incredible thing written within minutes, I think.  Go check it out here, after you read mine, of course!  You will not be disappointed.  I was in stitches.  He in turn, challenged me to use the title up there and include the words face hole and callipygian in a story as well.  This here story, my lovelies, is what happened when I started writing. (Also… it has music.  I can’t help it!)  I hope he will be pleased with the outcome and I hope you will be too.

Johnny stood at the foot of the bed asking himself if it would be worth leaving the house today. He felt doomed given that the recent events in his life had destined him to fail at everything. It seemed impossible to succeed today at all. He got up reluctantly taking steps to begin his day. Things couldn’t get any worse he thought. He struggled to stay positive though and decided that he would just brace himself. Whatever was around the corner for him, he would suck it up and swallow his fate. He lingered in front of the mirror looking at his face hole. That is all it was for him. Never been anything else. Somewhere to shove food in and spit out obscenities. He fucking hated himself just then. He felt the loneliness creep up into his head. The vile feeling of despair prancing around every thought, like headlights, blinding him. He proceeded to brush his teeth and move forward with his morning routine. The minutiae of life hurt him like pouring gasoline and lighting a fire on his balls. He stared again into the mirror, one last time to witness the now sonorous lines on his face. He was getting older and going nowhere.

“Fuck you Johnny!”

He exclaimed as if he was doing so to someone else entirely. How he wished he would have been able to knock some sense into his younger self long ago. Time had not been his friend and it rushed circumstances. He got dressed now in a raging fit. His anger for the day growing stronger with each movement, acid eating at his insides. Looking at the refrigerator rendered little comfort as he had not gone shopping for days. He slammed the refrigerator door as if making it pay for all his misfortunes. He swallowed his tears, grabbed his keys and blasted out of his apartment. Walking down the long hallway made him feel ill. The bland colors reminding him of his dull, pointless life. His dark eyes fell to the floor as he walked out of the building into the blazing sun, his relentless nemesis. He continued walking aimlessly, like a lost soul wandering the depths of purgatory. His dark thoughts became more pronounced with each step he took. Death was inevitable. He felt the sting of the thought in the lump in his throat.

The weather became unbearable to him. The clear skies and the sun shining on him pretending to be his best friend just made him angrier, enraged. What was the point to his life? Why did God decide to spit on him so much? Who the fuck cared! And right on the corner of death and life a soft voice reached his eardrums, causing a ruckus in his head.


She was wearing a red dress. It was simply cut, nothing fancy, but he noticed the rays shining off it were deliciously caressing her curves. He swallowed his bitter lump and looked into her big brown eyes. She smiled peacefully in anticipation of a friendly response. He took a breath and mustered up the will to remember her name. She was beautifully familiar. It had been a year. He straightened his posture and swallowed again.


“Yes! Oh my God Johnny! I thought you were dead or something. I tried to reach you so many times.”


“Yes! Remember we were supposed to meet again for dinner after that night. You said you were going to get a new number, but I never heard from you again. Umm… have you had breakfast? I’m going just up the street. Wanna join me?”

Johnny was dumbstruck. Here she was, a beautiful goddess come down to rescue him. Her instant warmth made him feel she was. Every single bad thought that had taken residence in his spirit, was destroyed with that warm crimson smile. He felt different, lifted somehow. She did that. Just like that.

“Johnny? Are you alright? I’m sorry maybe I’m being too forward but… I did feel a connection that night. OMG! Please don’t tell me your married or something awful like that! I mean not that it would be awful but… I’ve thought about you forever since that night and…”

He put his forefinger over her lips stopping from uttering another word. He remembered now. Her delicate ways. How she smiled at him at that party. She was a little shy and that caught his attention. He took her hand and walked out into the patio. It was chilly and he gave her his jacket. They talked until dawn. They connected and shared all their lives little intricacies in one natural voice. He felt the immediate rush of adrenaline in his body immediately. Her eyes looked at him know. Tenderly longing for his response. She swallowed a smile and went into a hazy trance. Her eyes lingering on his. His finger making her weak as he caressed her lips. He had wanted to kiss those lips that night, but she was shy then and now… She looked up at him as he got closer. He smiled for the first time in a long time. She bit her lip and smiled back.

“I am a little hungry. You look beautiful Elizabeth. Such a sight for this man’s weary eyes.”

She blushed and lowered her gaze. He held out his hand for hers. She closed her eyes and smiled. Her heart raced as she let her fingertips graze his and her smile became a grin as she finally let her hand clasp into his. She swallowed, looked into his eyes and took a breath. He was so handsome, sad but handsome. More than anything she noticed how soulful he had been that night. She recognized that in him. It was as familiar with him as if they had always known each other and there was just a temporary separation that kept them from fulfilling their connection, bringing it to a full circle.

They sat chatting up a storm. Catching up made her tear up when she heard of all the misery in his life just the past year. It had all started after they met. It had brought him down severely. She reached out and held his hand. She in turn told her story and he was in awe of her beaming personality, her laughter and her heart. He swallowed his nervous fear and embraced the moment. She smiled back a delicious smile licking the syrup from her lips after taking a bite of her pancakes. It made his breath heavy for her kiss. Their conversation came to a pause and their eyes lingered in each other’s dreams for a moment. She squeezed his hand and smiled.


“I have something to show you.”

She said pulling out a small tin. He let out such a laugh that it startled the patrons in the next booth.

“You kept the sex mints?”

“Well… I wanted to have them tested to make sure they would do what your callipygian ass said they would do.”

She responded with a soft laugh and a wink. Johnny threw his head back in roaring laughter. Sex mints were Tic-tacs labeled as such. It was his way of breaking the ice as he had trouble socializing. However, with her, he had eased into conversation naturally and the mints had been an after-thought joke. Now… the fact that she had kept them all this time, lifted his spirits beyond his wildest dreams. His mind raced with thoughts of sharing a life with her. His misery erased by her sweet smile and the possibility of this life together softly floating in the universe, intensified as she spoke.

“Johnny, I’m so glad I ran into you. I’ve thought about you every day since.”

“Oh… my sweet Elizabeth. I am in your debt and bound to you in any way you want. I’m in.”

With that she leaned over the table and pulled him in for a kiss.

© 2018 Mel Gutiér

20 thoughts on “Sex Mints

  1. Ward Clever

    Mel, you completely nailed this prompt, and I am so proud of you! On that alone, this is fantastic.

    But it’s also a sweet and touching story of people who missed each other before, but finally reconnected! I love that. I’m a sucker for a good romance, and you, my dear, are a master at romance. Truly!

    Liked by 1 person

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